This goes back a few years but it felt surreal at the time:

A chum and I were were passing a car park in front of a Brooklyn hospital's ER and we heard someone moaning loudly. Stopping, we saw the noises were coming from a heavily pregnant woman leaning against a taxi. A man with her was helping kids out of the back. In no apparent hurry, the guy helped one toddler out of the car, then a stroller, then another kid. We're thinking, get a move on. The guy got out his money for the taxi driver. That's 5 bucks, the driver said. The man replied, you said it would be $4. The driver gets out and they continue haggling as the woman howled. Then the woman crouched down and started to remove her underwear. $4, $5, I couldn't take it any longer and ran into the ER for help. Nurses came out with a trolly and the baby was born seconds later inside.

I just noticed that my packet of Strepsils (thankfully hardly needed now) states 'for oral administration only'

v

Under duress, I had a Starbucks sandwich for lunch. They had two grilled chicken options, regular and 'light'. I looked at the nutritional information. Same amount of fat in both; twice as much saturated fat in 'light' than regular. Got regular. It was disgusting.

My hairdryer instructions said that one should not use the hairdryer when asleep.

I was walking down my block past a row of brownstones with steps out front. On one of these steps sat a little old whitehaired woman with her dog, I think it was a Sheltie. The dog looked as old as she did (dog-years-wise). Walking in front of me was a guy and his Yorkie. As the Yorkie approached the steps where the Sheltie and his owner were, he looked up at them. The Sheltie got excited and started to go for the Yorkie. The little old whitehaired woman grabbed the leash and with all her might jerked it back to reprimand the Sheltie and said very sternly:
"Don't be an asshole!"

On my way to work this morning, I discovered several lengths of police "do not cross" tape draped across the road leading into Clerkenwell Green from Clerkenwell Road. Traffic & cyclists who had been about to turn out of the Green and onto the road were paused on one side of it, looking confused. None of the other roads in/out of Clerkenwell Green were cordoned off. There were no police officers to be seen.

After looking around (along with three cyclists and a bemused van driver), I walked around the cordon and continued on my way to work. There were no other signs of incident.

Massive great clap of thunder early this morning. Looked out of the window: blue sky. An explosion? Nothing on the news

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The officious spellcheck feature in Outlook just tried to change "parmigiana" to "ptarmigan".

A web site I was browsing started to play background music. And it was the same music I had playing on my CD player. Almost exactly in sync too, I almost didn't notice!

Adjacent items on page 2 of the Times' Metro section today:

-hundreds of chickens spilled onto the New Jersey Turnpike

-boa constrictor killed by commuter train

So I ask you, why do you think the chickens crossed the road?

To get away from the persuing boa-constrictor

Can't see what it is on the right.

Is this going to be called political?

(Referring to picture no.1)

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It's a computer game.

Political? How can it be political? It's a computer game.

Not being able to see what the thing is on the right, it wasn't clear, although the reward did seem a bit low

v

Herring fart.

Didn't that win an igNobel award?

Yes. That's where I found it.

Qatar to use robotic camel-jockeys from next year, to fend off accusations of child camel-jockey exploitation.

Dat's funny.

Overheard at the grocery this evening between A) a slightly disheveled woman, perhaps in her late 60s, who seemed like she might not get out that much, and B) a friendly, pregnant 30-something. They'd never met before.

A: Good evening.

B: Why hi there! How are you doing?

A: I'M DEPRESSED!

B: Why are you depressed?

A: I'm worried about the next two weeks, and what will happen on November 2!

B: Well, no need to be depressed now. Wait and see what happens. Perhaps you'll have no reason to be depressed, so chin up and keep the faith.

A: I dunno...I think I'm just going to be depressed. What kind of toilet paper do you use?

B (without skipping a beat): Usually Seventh Generation, but sometimes Charmin.

A: You know, Scott is The Best, and it's on sale! Only 60 cents a roll, for 1000 sheets!

B: Thanks, I'll have a look.

A: I'm not sure if you should go ahead and try it. If you don't like it, I don't want you to blame me!

A new sushi place on West 23rd St. - Deioh Sushi. (seriously)

Paris Hilton in the chair next to me at the salon...trying to keep her dark roots light and me trying to keep my 'light' roots dark

Yes, and seemed to be quite nice (at least over the hour or so I spent in her presence).

Bromely Brook School, in Manchester, VT, is a specialized boarding school for adolescent girls who are "struggling – whether emotionally, socially or academically". Just across the road is a restaurant named "The Perfect Wife".

I've eaten at a Japanese restaurant called Taka, and one called Sosumi. Yup, really.

Ya killin' me ovah here.

Douglas Hurd getting on the eastbound District Line train I was getting off at Earls Court the other day.

Mrs T this evening garnishing her cocktail sausages with Seven Minute Frosting

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Last night my neighborhood was overrun with miniature sized monsters, super-heroes, and ghosts. They were approaching occupied homes and openly demanding candy. No police were summoned as far as I could tell. Thank god I don't live on the ground level of my building.

http://www.nytimes.com/2004/10/31/jobs/31homefront.html

I wish this were surreal.

Very said and frustrating. I am convinced that many learning disabilities are really teaching disabilities. I see in the article that the woman is learning to sound out words. Why wasn't she taught that in elementary school? When my son was in first grade, he was totally stymied by the reading method taught in his school. When we moved and he came in during the middle of the year, another teacher, mature and experienced, immediately reached him with different method and he learned to read with ease in a few weeks.

A 4-wheeled Robin Reliant

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This morning I saw the Queen, in green.

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